The Secret of the Alien

This is just to good to keep to myself. One of the things Grandma sent Adrienne for her birthday was this set of blank bitty books. Jillian has done these before and they are great--blank little books with some stickers to help budding young authors create away. The girls decided to team up and write a book together. Jillian offered to transcribe what Adrienne dictated as the story, and then Adrienne illustrated the story. They sat at the table for a good 30 minutes working on this project and giggling hysterically as they did so. I have to admit that I was in tears laughing the first time I read this for many reasons....it's got it all---phonetic spelling, plenty of potty humor (with Adrienne as the brains behind the wording, this is inevitable), a nice little template for repetition that all good children's books should have. I dare you to read it and not laugh. I'll provide translations and commentary when appropriate. Shall we begin?

"The Secret of the Alien"

"He opened his underwear he saw whipped cream" (Starting off with a bang, eh??)

"Then his mom said, aliens don't do that" (Way to keep him in line, alien mom!)

"But I don't know why he did that. Do ask your dad" (Cuz Dad apparently has all the answers!?)

"And I'm really sorry" (note the copious amount of green tears flowing from the alien child)

"Dad I really love you anyways" (glad to see the young author supports unconditional love, despite the reprimand for the whipped cream in the underwear)

"I love you more than anything" (sucking up to Dad, I see! What about mom???)

"He looked in his underwear he saw tomatoes" (Here we go again. I guess this little alien is a limit tester)

"He opened his underwear he saw a cake" (What is this alien's mother feeding him??)

"He opened his underwear he saw poop"

"He opened his underwear he saw a bird" (OK, now I want to know who in the world "opens their underwear" to look for stuff as much as this alien does??)

"He opened and saw a crown"

"Then Mom said 'Get rid of all this stuff'" (Go mom!! Way to whip this alien into shape. I especially love that the mom alien is apparently holding a trash bag in this picture. Hmmmm...I wonder where the author has seen that before??)